Archive for Stupid Inserts

Stupid Inserts Part V: 2000 Pacific Christmas Ornaments

Posted in Stupid Inserts with tags , , , , , , on December 24, 2009 by Cardboard Icons

If ever there was a bigger design fail, I’d like to see it. The visual appeal of these Ornament cards are great; die-cut card stock, holofoil and holiday colors make up a background where upon a player’s image is set. But the 2000 renditions of this set, the first time Pacific did them, was an epic disaster because Pacific decided to include a piece of elastic string which ultimately left every single card with a crease right down the middle.

The string can be moved, but as you can see here, it really doesn’t make much of a difference. If you look at the card from the bottom, you can see how the card stock has conformed around the string.

In 2001 Pacific went back to the well again , and the result was a much better card; this time no string was attached and the hole was made as a pop out for optional usage.

Stupid Inserts Part II: 2004 UD Vintage 3-D Sluggers

Posted in Newspaperman with tags , , , , , , on September 30, 2009 by Cardboard Icons

2004VintageSluggersJohnnyDamonVintage sets are all the rage these days, and they have been for the better part of the last decade. Ever since Topps released 2001 Topps Heritage — a hat tip to the 1952 Topps design — companies left and right have worked to produce their own replica sets. In 20o4, Upper Deck sorta thought outside of the box and tried to remake the 1954 Red Heart set. Don’t worry if you don’t remember the original set, it’s not exactly a mainstream set. (Kinda negates the purpose, no?)

Anyway, the base 2004 Vintage set was a complete failure and utterly hideous in my opinion. But within that set was one of the dumbest subsets I’ve ever seen. Enter the “3-D Sluggers.” I suppose these were also a tribute to a vintage set — any of the 1960s or 1970s Kellogg’s 3-D cards — but why is this part of this Vintage set? Secondly, the technology used in these remake 3-D cards is so crappy that the 3-D effect does not translate as well as the originals. The end result is a one-dimensional image that appears blurry because of the plastic coating. And lastly the name: Sluggers. Is Johnny Damon, the guy featured on the pictured card, your idea of a premier power hitter? Not I. Hell, Damon had 12 total homers in 2003, the year before this card was released. TWELVE.

Stupid Inserts Part I: 2008 Topps Year in Review

Posted in Newspaperman with tags , , , , , on September 25, 2009 by Cardboard Icons

In my 20-plus years of collecting, I’ve run across my fair share of cards that looked stupid, or just were based upon their subject matter. Enter ‘Stupid Inserts.” In my year and a half as a baseball card blogger, I’ve spent many a moment staring at certain cards — specifically inserts — that several years after their release seem very comedic to me. As a new installment on my blog, I will expose those cardboard failures.

Part I: 2008 Topps “Year in Review”2008ToppsYIRShawnHill

Somewhere in some office, someone got paid to think up an idea to create an insanely large insert set (like 100 cards) that highlighted certain achievements during the baseball season. Good idea, right? I mean collector’s already ~love~ those “Season Highlights” cards that are already part of the regular set, so they’ll totally embrace an insert set that takes the same crappy theme and beats it into the ground. Well, I’m sure someone signed off on the idea thinking that we’d see some more Derek Jeter or David Wright highlights, but what we ended up with was shit like this Shawn Hill insert that lauds his APRIL effort. Yes, I said April … and so does the headline on this card.

In case you’re wondering, Hill went 2-2 with a 2.76 ERA over five starts and struck out 20 batters over 32 innings … in APRIL. The infograph on the card also notes that he “often looked like an ace when healthy” and didn’t allow more than 2 earned runs in any start during that month. Did I forget to mention this was in April? Hill finished the season with 3.42 ERA over 92 innings, but missed half of May, all of June and July, and half of August with an injury before returning. Was Hill’s April really worth a special insert? Only Shawn Hill’s mom and the guy who thought up this crappy insert set believes that.